5 months ago I went through the process of being matched with girls who would be in community with me. I met so many amazing girls through the process. I met girls who were solid in their faith, I met baby Christians who were hungry for the word and who's passion inspired me and I met 4 amazingly beautiful girls who would soon be part of the community group God chose for me to lead.
Throughout that entire process I prayed heavily for the girls who would be in my group. I had no idea who God would choose but I knew He had a plan, He always has a plan! I prayed that the Lord would soften my heart to whatever struggles they had and that He would equip me with compassion, love, empathy, insight, and wisdom to help them through their struggles. I prayed that with all the flaws written all over me, they would be able to see through the flaws and trust that I was serving our creator and I would lead them well. I prayed that God would remove my insecurities and self doubt and replace it with confidence in knowing that He equipped me to lead them well. I prayed that the Lord would move, that He would speak to us and we would hear Him and that He would change our hearts.
As I got the news of who would be in my group I was so excited but also overwhelmed. Through the process of sharing life maps, these girls revealed struggles I had never dealt with and I doubted my ability to empathize and encourage them through what they were going through. God quickly minimized my fears and doubt as I got to know these girls and the relationships I began to form with them completely opened my eyes and changed my heart. During one of our times of sharing, my friend who is celebrating 1 year of sobriety today, shared these words... "Some days after I get home from work, I would love to have a glass of wine, just one glass... But I know I can't have just one glass." Those words resonated with me so much that night. In the midst of my struggle with food God used her words to help me realize I had an addiction, a dependence on something I could not control and He completely broke me. Her words stirred inside my heart that night and still ring in my head today.
You see, all the time I was praying about how I was going to impact these girls and shine light into their lives, I completely forgot about how God would be using them to shine light into mine. I am so blessed to be allowed to be part of their lives and part of their story and I am so thankful for the encouragement, accountability and truth they have spoken and continue to speak into my life. S, I am so incredibly proud of you, your dedication and drive are such an inspiration. Your journey has helped give me the confidence that I can fight my addiction as well. M, your love and compassion for others brings joy to my life. I love how big your heart is! J, the insight and wisdom you bring to every conversation we have inspires me. I love the boldness you have when you speak truth into my life. B, you have been my rock! You have encouraged me and held me accountable even when I didn't want it and you've done it in such a loving way. I am so blessed by all of you! I love you girls!
No comments:
Post a Comment